Hey, Honey. Sorry I've been a little out of touch. I didn't even have time to rinse the molasses and glitter off me from the SpankBank Magazine photo shoot when Sarah Palin and her family wheeled up to the trailer for our shin-dig. She gave me a big old bear hug and said,"Eve, you haven't changed a bit!" Guess what that girl brought me. No, a wild monkey! Cutest thing I've ever seen. I think once he gets used to being indoors he will settle down. What a thoughtful gift. The Juniors named him Pollock because he likes to throw sh#t around. Pollock's going to be a great addition to our family.
Sarah and I met years ago when I won the Ididorod. We've been real close ever since. That baby, Trig ,is my Godson. I couldn't be there for his birth, because I was incarcerated, so I was pleased as punch to finally lay eyes on on the little bugger. Sarah's going to leave him with me while she's out campaigning. He's no trouble at all.
Well, everbody scarfed down the tuna casserole I'd taken out of the deep freeze. I think it tastes better when served frozen and from all the dirty Chinette plates, I'd say it was a big hit. We had time to do a couple of shots of Jaegermeister before we all loaded up and went to Jitters'wrestling match. Even Daddy came out of the dryer to join us. I was glad. He's been so down since his ice cream truck was stolen. As usual, Jitters beat the stuffing out of her opponent. She's so damned cocky! Y'all check it out on that top UTube video up there in the corner. You will see why I can't ever have that troll mad at me!
All the kids had a big time playing with the flamethrowers. Kid and Kracker jammed for us till dawn out at the Jello pool. Yep, we sure made some memories.
I had to spray all my Juniors and Juniorettes down with the garden hose early this morning so we could get up to the school. Y'all remember that I instituted my new plan to improve Car Pool traffic flow. It was like shooting fish in a barrel. I put my baby, Won Ton, in charge of tazing any adult who got out of their car. He's got such good aim. The 49 wrecker drivers I had at the scene quickly towed the empty vehicles while the owners were still knocked out. Car Pool problem solved. And that laundry service the school is providing me is going to be a lifesaver too. Now I can just drop them all off nekid after their hose bath and they get dressed at school! Sometimes, I can't believe how blessed I am.