That's a pithcer of me and ma twin, Tinsel. Does Pollock on ma shoulder make ma butt look big?

Twins Trailer Trash

Monday, November 3, 2008

Baby, I'm gone be doin' a different kind a pole dance tomorrow.












Hey, Hon....how you been gettin' long? Let me hug your neck...now, git on in this trailer and fix me a drank. Make yourself useful, Shug...not that I wouldn't keep you 'round jist to look at you. Gawd knows I would, He told me so this mornin. Take a load oft, Lovebug. There's somethin' kindly serious I want to talk to to talk to you 'bout...... Naawww, I still don't want to marry you. I'm sorry to lead in like that, it was thoughtless of me. Most folks don't know this but, we got us a Presidential election comin' up here real soon. Well, Hon, don't feel too bad... they ain't mentioned it hardly t'all in the news. But it ain't too late fer you to git your two cents into the ring, don't worry.



Babe, this trailer here is place where all walks of life is welcome to git thangs oft their chest- long as they pay up front in cash. Folks is allowed to speak their minds and iffin I like what they is sayin', or I thank it's funny, I usually let 'em stay indefinitely. In my line of work, many of my clients is very high profile individuals, so, I don't often discuss current events. In my bidness, confidentiality is paramount- and it's also real important. So, I have elected not to launch any big political crusade, or lobby for a particular candidate. Damn straight, Sarah Palin and me go way back. Yep, two of her children live with me now, they both tickle me. That's right, Darlin' Sarah did give me my beloved monkey, Pollock. That don't mean I'm gone vote for her, and it don't me I ain't. My girl and me is way tighter than that!



See, that's one of the thangs that makes America the greatest country in the entire United States! Everbody here has the right to their own opinion or someone else's. Even the the folks that ain't got no sense at all, got a Gawd givin' right to act a fool. Y'all know, I'm a lover, not a fighter, although my criminal record may show that I have been both at various times. I'm just sayin', y'all, git your cute tails out there and vote for that one fella or that other fella. Or, if you really want to waste your time, vote for somebody else. It's all over but the cryin' anyway.


Now, iffin you really want to cast a vote that could make a tremendous difference, Baby....tell me which shoes you thank look cuter with ma out fit to wear up to the votin' booth tomorrow? Me and the gals from the Pony is gone be out there all morinin' rustlin up customers. Y'all come see us, now, do you hear me?

55 comments:

Chica said...

with that particular outfit, definably go with the first heels. Although I'm lovin those boots, where are they at in black? I wanna pretend I'm wearin' em. :D

eve cleveland said...

Chica..
Girl, I got 'em ever color! Come on over and git you whatever you want.
Eve

Chat Blanc said...

Sex-ay! I have to go with the platform heels. They'll make your legs look longer AND the extra skin showing will bring more customers. :D

eve cleveland said...

Kitty..
Good point. better go load up on some Sally Hansen spray on stockins- we ain't used to bein' in the harsh light of day.
Eve

QuirkyLoon said...

You are so funny, but you probably already know that.

If the weather is cool, go for the boots. If it's warm, go for the platform heels.

It's all about practicality. I hope you got your red/white/blue sarong to cover up in case of chills.

If not, ask your buddy Sarah, I betcha she's got one.

Swe-eet!

Dano MacNamarrah said...

Eve~What a wonderful public service you are doing. You go, girl!

I agree with Chica and Chat Blanc, most def the heels, unless it's chilly. They go together so well. But I know how toasty my knee-highs keep me, so don't be getting a cold now!

If you can't get hold of the spray stockings, see if you have any thigh-high stockings. They always add a little je ne sais pas!

Have fun. poppet! You are an inspiration.

Groovy Black Chick said...

Boots are *always* the grooviest. Thumbs up on those!

eve cleveland said...

Quirkster..
Yeah, I know... but I never tire of hearing it outside my own head! Girl, you are so smart for a loon, I am gone brang both pair and see how it goes...Sarah borrowed that cover up from me and she never did give it back.. I am fixin to git on the horn now.
Eve

Bill said...

I sure do admire your loyalty to your country Eve, and you're totally right, America IS the best country in the U. S. of A.!

I'd recommend the high boots so you got someplace to put money, just in case some business comes up while you're voting :>)

eve cleveland said...

Dano, Darlin'...
As always, you is the voice of reason...I sure don't want no cold like the one you got.
Thigh-high stockins, now I usually charge extry fer that, but you know, I am quite the patriot.
Hearts and hugs to you, sista.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Groovy Black Chick..
Well, I bet this here's the only blogga that has her very own stylist! Fer real, Sis, thanks. You bein' a professional and all. Will you do my make-up too, perty please?
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Bill,
Leave it to a Canadian to be the first dude up in here to show some sense. Good call on the boots cause ma bra's already stuffed.
Eve

Jeffman said...

I, of course, am unable to vote for either gent, due to prior engagements and a troublesome time difference.

However, I shall be spoiling my ballot paper in spirit at some point during the day, as way of celebration.

Oh, and the boots, by thunder! The BOOTS!!!

Anonymous said...

The boots hide too much leg...people say I'm kind of a leg person, so I'd go with those platforms...

Groovy Black Chick said...

I will! Lemme go hunt down that eye glitter and harlot red lipstick. I been waitin for just the right occasion to bust 'em out!

Anonymous said...

Eve,
You are such a patriot! I haven't voted since W was a drunk. Do they still have those booths with curtains? If so, I could use a hand from you. Is that allowed? Did you and Sarah have to draw straws to decide who was going to accept McCain's invite?
JW Booth

Da Old Man said...

Eve, the shoes don't matter. Last time I saw you at the Pony, I didn't look at your feet.

Thinkinfyou said...

You wear an outfit like that and those shoes,my bet is that you'll be the one who ends up being elected president!!
EVE FOR PRESIDENT!!! It's got a nice ring to it,doesn't it?

eve cleveland said...

Groovy black chick!
You are fast becomin' my new BFF.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

JW Booth,
Iffin, they ain't got no curtains, I gone brang some old shower curtains Won Ton bleached today. So make sure you got cash.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Old Man..
You say the sweetest thangs, Baby. Y'all see why I love him so?
I'll be by directly and I'm gone git you out of that recliner...
Eve

eve cleveland said...

T!
Do you thank it is too late fer me to be a write in? Let's git on it now, Sis. You be my runnin' buddy. Git yourself all glittered up and come on over.
Eve

The Hussy Housewife said...

If you were running..I'd vote for ya!! Now go lace up them boots!

AngieSS said...

Hehehe, at first I thought you said "hustlin'" up customers and I was ready to don my patriotic daisy-dukes -- but, you said "rustlin" and I ain't did that since that last cowboy came through town. :(

And I think you should go for the pumps -- they are rockin' hot!

Hale McKay said...

I won't pick which to wear with that outfit - because I'm sure either one is gonna look great with you clad in 'em.

Thinkinfyou said...

You know I'll be there. Hell I can be like a pit bull.Plus I wear a prettier shade of lipstick than Palin does. We'd win hands down!!

eve cleveland said...

Hussy,
Git on down here with another load of them shuga pills! It is gone be a long day, Sis.
Brang your spray starch,
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Hale..
Well, I'll say, you would make a perty good politician your own self. Tell me more..
Eve

eve cleveland said...

T..
We got our very own make up arist- the real professional kind that has worked on live people! With your looks and my booze- there ain't no way we can lose! Hey, there's our campaing slogan, Girl.
Eve

John J Savo, the Authoring Auctioneer said...

I'd go with the shoe rather than the boots, but only if you can also wear patriotic thigh high stockings as well.

Deb said...

The boots, Eve, the boots. Everyone knows in politics you need boots. The higher the better!

eve cleveland said...

John J...
You know I'd do anythang fer you, Darlin'. We been over that several times....I thank I left them stockins at your place.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Deb...
I'm gittin tarred of shovelin' already! Honey, call the doctor, I thank I'm gonna crash..
Eve

nikkicrumpet said...

I read your posts and I sit here..shake my head and chuckle...You kill me! I guess if you're gonna do the real important stuff like voting...you better go all the way and wear the boots. People will know you're serious because you took all that time to lace em up!

Jenn Thorson said...

Why, you shore will be celebratin' 'Merican patriotism with heels and daisy dukes like them! I know what I'm wearin' t'work temorrey. :)

eve cleveland said...

Nikki..
Shug...I'm doin' all kinds of stuff for free today! I tell you what, I admire my devotion and loyalty to this great country of ours...'cause some of this stuff ain't much fun.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Jenn,
Atta Girl! Let me know iffin you need you a sparkly tube top..I got loads of em.
Eve

Angie Atkinson said...

Haha...LOVE IT!!

eve cleveland said...

Angie,
Girl, I bleeve you are a new face round here. You sure are cute! Thanks for stoppin by. Long as you love me, you come back any time.
Eve

Kristen said...

I'm a thinkin the shoes do a better matchin but them there boots sure are a looker

nikkicrumpet said...

You are so right Eve...and I admire your devotion too! And I greatly admire the fact that you could even wear that outfit and walk in those shoes!!! Great book shelf! It does class up the place. Especially when you read such an vast variety of books. I'm pretty much stuck in the "fluff fiction" genre. Oh well...nobody ever accused me of being intelligent!

Lidian said...

That is one fancy outfit! Love it.

I am sitting up here in Canada in a very unfancy outfit keeping track of the US election stuff.

In my avatar I am wearing a tutu but that's for running errands.

eve cleveland said...

K..
As a hooker, I'm gone go with the looker!
Beauty knows no pain,
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Nikki,
Don't feel too bad, Darlin'. You ain't got much to worry 'bout so, bein' smart ain't real important for a gal like you. But you got good decoratin ideas, sure nuff. You thank I should replace this astro-turff in the den?
Eve

eve cleveland said...

Lidian,
Hon, next time you down this way..I got dibs on that hat!
Eve

VE said...

Will you be wearing that outfit? Lordy...the elections are getting more exciting!!

eve cleveland said...

VE..
Hey, Honey..git that ironman tail of yours back here...you ain't said which shoes you want!
Eve

Dano MacNamarrah said...

Well, spray cheese on a Triscuit, you have done the country proud!

I stopped by earlier, while you were out with the girls from The Pony. I just won an award that you already have, you amazing woman, and wanted to learn how to upload it.

Baby Jesus shone the light on me, just 'coz I was near your trailer. So, now I have a pretty picture of it on my blog. I had to cross you off the list of people I'd give it to.

Not that you don't deserve a double dipping, on account of your hard work. No, you have a full deck of awards. But there are others out there that need it more.

Good news is that Obama won. Which means we won't be moving to Canada. So, I will be stopping by the Won Ton Estates to see you all. Hopefully next year.

eve cleveland said...

Dano..
Sis..I was hollerin' fer you earlier. You was out scourin the globe defendin' civil rights fer folks like me and you. Hon, I'm so glad you do that so I don't have to! I'll be by directly to see what you got for me over there.
Hearts with red and blue glitter, white don't show up good,
Eve

Dan Brantley said...

Eve,
I'm sorry, but I am beginning to think you are an imposter... either that or you chose the books on your Shelfari booksehlf just to impress people and if I picked one up the pages would still be all stiff and uncut like the book had never even been opened much less read.
So which is it? Are you a closet intellectual? Or a trailer park poser? Not that there is anything wrong with either one... I'm just askin'

eve cleveland said...

Dan, Baby...
What I am is a hybrid. You are studyin' the only member of MENSA that is Pure D white trash. Ain't nothin' in the bylaws says you can't be both. I got Ivy League diplomas we use for birdcage liner round here, Darlin'. It's the school a hard knocks thats done served me best. I'm a modern day prophet and a hooker with a heart of gold. Any questions?
Eve

Donna said...

LOL.... I cant stop laughing!!!!!! You are too funny! (LOL) Dem heels are HOT!!! I would have to vote for the open toes.......... (LOL)

I will be certain to come back and give you a HOLLA!!!

xoxoxo
Donna

TheFLy said...

Is this where the pole dancing is happening? I just came by to see some hot pole dancing action. ☺

eve cleveland said...

Donna,
Girl, I am so glad I found you up in Nikki's house...thanks for stoppin' by. We got to get together.
Eve

eve cleveland said...

FLy,
Honey, you hardly ole enough to git in this trailer. But you know I ain't gone card you..come on in here, and fix mama a drank.
Eve

If Mama ain't happy...somebody's gonna get kilt.