Boo, Babe! Oh, I didn't mean to scare you that bad, Darlin'. I'm sorry... I thought you saw that meat cleaver coming at you! That's one of the little games the kids and I play during October. So keep that in mind when you come in the trailer-heads up! We just throw it at folks for fun. Naw, Honey, we aim for the door frame not the person! What kind of mother do you think I am? It does give people a start every time, good to keep 'em on their toes. Oh, Honey, Pollock sure 'nuff knicked your ear, he's not that great a marksman. But this is merely a flesh wound, here rub some bacon on it. Why don't you go make yourself comfortable and I will be in there quick as I show Pollock how to throw the meat cleaver-again! I can't get too upset with him because, he's just a monkey for God's sake.
Ahhh, o.k., Baby...where were we? Oh, yeah? You like all our Halloween decorations? Naw, Sugar, that's not a mummy....You know Daddy, say "Hey" Daddy. I just got him all wrapped up like that since he had that come uppence with turkey frier. He does kind of fit with our theme pretty good. Awww, Sweetie, now you're just teasin' me. How many times have you woken up on the fold out and seen those cobwebs? Those have been there for years....yes, you know good and well them spiders are real. I like them because they eat other bugs, it's fun to watch. Saves me from having to pay an exterminator too. Hahaha, I reckon it is Halloween round here all year. You remember that I am a graduate of the Moriticia Adams School of Design? I know, Darlin', I really do have a knack. I should shoot Morticia an IM...that gal still has some of my dresses I want to get back.
Now, what you got to say about the punkins the Joons and I carved all day? Nawww, baby. Those are not human heads. We don't keep human heads in the trailer, do you think we are crazy people? See how we got 'em lined up on the fence post over yonder? You are so silly! Those at the dinette set are punkins. They really are lifelike though aren't they. The kids used some old mug shots from their "Is this my Daddy?" game. I must say, it's a damn good likeness if my memory serves me correctly. One of those Daddies should be comin' up for parole here shortly... Are my children not the most creative people! I am just so blessed to have 'em all, give or take a few. For the most part, the lot of 'em are real special.
Hey, Sweetness, would you mind runnin' me up to the Funeral Home? I need to pick up a coffin right quick. Won Ton got a real good deal on it because it hasn't been used except for visitations. Well, now, I hadn't thought about using it for a Halloween decoration, but that is a good idea. You are always thinkin', ain't you, Baby? We bought it because we found out that we got to disclose that there was a death on the premisis when we rent out Bobby's trailer. You remember all that ruckus a few weeks back. No, Honey, Bobby is long been buried, well he is in the deep freeze for now....Anyhoo, Won Ton decided to turn Bobby's old trailer into a Hospice Trailer. That means that folks will need to pay 6 months rent in advance...get the drift. I think it's a winner and they can't complain about anybody being murdered in there because they are fixin' to die any minute themselves. Oh, we need the coffin because we are going to include burial services with the rent. Boy, you sure don't have much of a head for bidness, Hon. Come on, I will explain it on the way.