Idol hands

Y'all, I had me one of them days today. Left me lookin' like I been been pulled backwards through a keyhole. That costs extra, jist so you know. Anyhoo, got to visit with a old friend of mine. We go way back... lot of historical features between us. He's jist as cute as a kitten in glitter. This fella's got two eyes, like most folks, only his don't match. I always call him Ziggy. He stays real busy, some kind of mogul or 'nother. But we manage to hook up whenever his schedule allows, he still travels a good bit. American is Ziggy's second language, he's from that country called Jolly Old that I can't find on no World Map. I can't hardly understand nothin' he says no way, but the man can sure sing. And when he says "Let's dance" ..well, it's real persuasive.


He's always claimed he's got a thang fer little china girls and ours is a modern love. Far be it from me to point out the flaws there. Like my mama says, "You don't wake a snake to kill it." Today he was just yammerin' on 'bout bidness and signin' parchments with a quill. So, I got to fiddlin' with his laptop. I ain't good with stray buttons, y'all. I try to keep my hands busy - a smoke and a drink in each at all times. But the service was fairly poor there ,since he gave the staff the day oft. I made a few bad strokes and lost some perty important cypherins on his computer. He was a teensy bit ornry with me fer a minute or more. But we worked the kinks out and it was stardust again. Ziggy wrote this lil song fer me and I thought y'all might git a kick out of it. I promise I won't go pushin' buttons when I don't know what they might do ever again! Unless that is what someone is wanting me to do-customer service is my strongsuit. Well, here's the song.

Hey, Eve, oh leave my keyboard alone, you know..

Hey, Eve, oh Honey, get me the phone, I gotta..

Hey, Eve, I'm gonna take back your mace..

This smokin' whack b#tch just knocked myspace out of place...

Hey, Eve, you are to blame..

Hey, Eve, it's all quite a shame...

Hey, Eve, well, what the f#ck and gotdamn..

She said she had to tease me but she...then she....

CHORUS

Oh, don't go mean on me M'am, cause I'm not s'possed to kickit

Just sit there and look pretty

Oh, don't go mean on me, M'am

'Cause you lie there and get lit

Just sit there and look pretty

It ain't right...but she's tight

Hey, Eve, Honey, you go unwind..I'll pay

Hey, Eve, these things can take time, this may

Hey, Eve, might I get you a beer?

Just please don't let my wife hear...here she comes, here she comes...

CHORUS

Oh.. Iman hit me!

Well, then I had the good sense to take my leave. Y'all know good and well what I said on the way out...yeah. Wham, Bam Thank You, M'am. I'm not one to interfere with domestic squabblins, I jist 'cause 'em. That wife of his is a long, tall drink of water, let me tell you what. Real perty lady, 'cept it looked to me like she ain't nibbled on so much as a cotton ball since the 80's. Almost as skinny as one of them Ethiopian folks. But like I said, I ain't gone git up in their problems. With all that clatter goin' on today I forgot 'bout makin' a post fer my dear friend, Ettarose Carnival. So, jist tween you and me...I'm gone send this here as my entry. It ain't gone matter that Ziggy wrote that silly lil song, is it? I mean, it ain't like he's some big deal anybody's ever heard of or nothin'. Y'all go see Ettarose and check out the carnival at http://sanityonedge.blogspot.com/. Meet me at the kissin' booth after my shift is over, aright?